Couples Therapy in Los Altos
Couples Therapy to Help You Communicate, Heal, and Grow Together
Do You Feel Disconnected, Frustrated, or Alone in Your Relationship?
• Have conversations with your partner become charged, distant, or repetitive?
• Does it feel like everything turns into an argument or, worse, gets quietly brushed aside?
• Have work demands, parenting, or shifting priorities pulled you apart emotionally or physically?
• Do you miss the closeness, affection, and ease you once shared?
Many couples begin with deep connection, but over time stress, unspoken expectations, and emotional injuries can create distance. What once felt effortless now requires attention, and communication may feel tense or avoidant. You may wonder:
"Why can’t we talk the way we used to?"
"Are we growing apart?"
"Is there something wrong with us?"
When the Relationship Dynamic Changes, It Can Feel Unsettling
After the early stage of a relationship fades, partners naturally develop new ways of expressing needs, coping with stress, and communicating. Sometimes those differences create misunderstandings that echo far louder than intended. One partner may withdraw; the other may pursue harder. Both may feel unheard.
Arguments, emotional shutdowns, recurring tension, or feeling like “roommates” instead of partners can be especially painful. Even when the relationship looks stable from the outside, you may feel isolated inside it.
But you’re not alone — and you’re not failing.
With the help of couples counseling, you can learn to reconnect, rebuild trust, and communicate more effectively.
Most Couples Experience Periods of Distance or Difficulty
Relationship struggles are incredibly common. Research shows that 67% of couples report declining satisfaction during major life transitions,¹ that communication problems are the leading reason couples seek help², and stress, grief, career demands, emotional injuries, parenting, and unmet needs all shape how partners interact.
Life stressors Can Affect Your Bond
Major life changes — such as parenting, eldercare, pregnancy, career shifts, illness, or bereavement — require emotional energy. When one or both partners feel overwhelmed, communication and connection naturally suffer. What starts as emotional protection can create distance:
Withdrawing to avoid conflict
Becoming reactive under stress
Feeling unappreciated or unseen
Misinterpreting the other’s intent
From Intimate Partners to Functioning Roommates
When intimacy fades or communication breaks down, couples often feel embarrassed to talk about it — even with each other. Topics like dwindling affection, a lack of sexual desire, emotional neglect, or even infidelity can widen the divide.
Over time, the couple may drift into parallel lives. You may feel like you’re sharing a home but not an emotional world.
But this disconnect doesn’t mean your relationship is broken beyond repair.
With professional support, couples therapy, marriage counseling, or intimacy counseling can help you heal old wounds and build a stronger, more connected partnership.
Couples Therapy Can Help You Rebuild Connection, Strengthen Communication, and Deepen Intimacy
As a couples therapist, I work to create an environment where both partners feel safe, respected, and understood. My goal is to help you slow down the patterns that keep you stuck and begin relating to one another with more clarity, compassion, and intention.
Whether you have been struggling for months or for many years, couples counseling can help you understand your relational cycle, identify unmet needs, and develop a more secure and satisfying connection.
How I Work With Couples in Therapy
In our sessions, I take a balanced, attuned approach rooted in attachment psychology, psychodynamic insight, and practical communication tools. I help both partners:
Understand what drives their reactions
Express emotions more clearly
Interpret each other’s signals and needs
Repair ruptures with honesty and compassion
Rebuild trust and closeness
Whether we're doing traditional couples therapy and marriage counseling, or more focused work like intimacy therapy, the process centers on strengthening your emotional bond.
Creating Space for Both Partners to Feel Heard
Many people enter therapy feeling misunderstood. My role as a couples counselor and marriage counselor is to ensure each partner’s experience is honored while guiding you toward shared understanding. I help you move away from blame and toward insight, curiosity, and empathy.
When communication becomes safer, couples can talk about difficult topics without fear of conflict, rejection, or shutdown.
Effective Tools for Better Communication
To support your progress outside of session, I integrate structured exercises commonly used in couples communication counseling and couples communication therapy, including:
Intentional dialogue techniques
Daily or weekly check-ins
Conflict de-escalation tools
Emotional attunement exercises
Date-night or connection-building “homework”
These practices help you reconnect in ways that feel grounded and authentic, not forced or artificial.
Supporting Intimacy and Healing
If your relationship has suffered from emotional distance, misunderstandings around sexual needs, or ruptures in trust, therapy can help you address these areas with honesty and compassion. Through intimacy counseling or intimacy therapy, we explore both partners’ stories, experiences, and vulnerabilities to rebuild emotional and physical closeness.
My Experience Working With Couples
I draw from years of clinical experience helping individuals, families, and couples navigate conflict, communication challenges, emotional disconnection, and relational transitions. As a marriage therapist and couples therapist, I have seen couples make profound changes when they feel supported, committed, and open to learning about themselves and each other.
You don’t need to be the same people you were years ago to build a beautiful life together now — you simply need a renewed way of relating.
Common Questions About Couples Counseling
What if my partner is hesitant or unwilling to come to therapy?
It’s common for one partner to feel uncertain. Sometimes fear, past experiences, or anxiety about conflict get in the way. You can reassure them that therapy is not about blaming either partner — it’s about understanding patterns and strengthening your relationship. If helpful, we can schedule a brief consultation so they can get a feel for the process before committing.
Are our issues too big or too old to address in therapy?
Most couples fear that exploring difficult topics will make things worse. In reality, avoiding the issues is what keeps them stuck. Whether you’re dealing with communication breakdowns, emotional injuries, or unresolved resentment, marriage therapy or couples counseling can help you understand the deeper patterns and begin repairing them at a sustainable pace.
Is couples therapy worth the cost and time?
Investing in your relationship supports emotional wellbeing, reduces stress, and enhances daily functioning. In many cases, healing your partnership costs far less — emotionally and financially — than the toll of ongoing conflict or disconnection. I offer accessible options when possible because I believe every couple deserves support.
You Deserve a Relationship Filled With Understanding, Support, and Connection
If you’re ready to communicate more clearly, reconnect emotionally, and strengthen your relationship, I’m here to help.
I offer a free 15–30 minute consultation so you can ask questions and get a sense of whether this approach feels right for you.
You don’t have to navigate this alone — together, we can help you rebuild the partnership you want to share.
Sources
¹ Shapiro, A.F., & Gottman, J.M. (2005). Effects of the transition to parenthood on relationship satisfaction.
² AAMFT. Couples Communication Statistics.